Obscurity
by mjoelk
Summary: "You're the only person who would notice someone as out of place as I am. Who else would notice a foreign-born young lady hiding inside the curtains? Only a person who was standing in his spot and letting people pass you by. " My very first story. It's written by a guy, ok?


_Yo, so I wrote a thing. __Although this was my first story, this was my very first time writing a story in which it's a guy-to-guy relationship. Even better, one of the guys is dressed like a girl. I won't say who it is until you've ploughed through a forest of over 5100 words of this short story._

_I have no idea why I titled it as 'Obscurity' maybe because what happens later on is hidden from the public, or I just took some sentences from the story and made it a summary. Maybe I'm just so lazy I can't think of a good summary._

_Now some dumb BS over, enjoy the story. Review, be nice, do whatever you choose. (Because I had a feeling no one's ever written a story where it's yaoi, but one of them is a cross-dresser...)_

_So the whole story is __AU, set around mid-1890s. While Gilbert and Roderich were also among the characters, Ludwig and Feliciano are main characters. And although Ludwig would do something really bad to Feliciano (who was in disguise), it's still T-rated. If I added more during that scene, it'd definitely be M.  
_

* * *

It all started with an invitation.

Handwritten in smooth cursive font, it was indeed made for a special occasion. After all, the end of the year was drawing to a close as soon as midnight arrives.

But for a certain young man, this was only the beginning of what he would later regret.

At twenty-four years of age, Ludwig was indeed in his category as a gentleman: tall, rather broad, and with an image of a soldier. Since most of his family, and his nearly male relatives, served in the battlefield at least once, it was a trait that had passed down ever since. He was taught by his father to shoot a scarecrow dummy of an enemy soldier in their backyard with a rifle by the time he was fourteen, before he was sent to training a year later and finally to battle at eighteen. However, before he was taught how to use a weapon, his mother taught him, who was only three, the countless rules on being a proper gentleman and behaving towards the women of society, be it young or old. He noticed that as he grew up, his older brother Gilbert lacked the trait as their father, throwing obscenities in anger when in reality it was their fault for making a mess.

While Gilbert inherited their father's rowdy behaviour, Ludwig earned their mother's gentle trait. Yet despite the wild behaviour Gilbert had from his father, he still treated the ladies with utmost respect. However, Ludwig would simply back away from rather than approaching them. Whether it was the gossip the ladies share amongst each other or the subject brought up which made him uncomfortable, he had no idea. But he was certain being away from society for a few years was a factor.

Wearing a formal suit for the occasion that night, Ludwig checked himself to make sure everything is in order. _A gentleman must always be clean, without anything out of place…_Their mother would always remind him and Gilbert before leaving for any formal occasion. But since he and his brother live together with everything they had inherited, he wondered if the rule still applies, since their mother passed away when Ludwig was five and their father died fighting in the battlefield.

"Is it the Edelsteins again?" Ludwig asked Gilbert, who was having trouble tying his white bowtie around his shirt collar. Although he had been in parties before, all of them were held in their summer residence, when their mother was still alive. He wondered if it's because their mother knew Ludwig would be awkward if he attends a party in someone else's house, adding the fact that he wouldn't be around ladies either. "Didn't they have one the other day?"

"Our family knew them for a long time," Gilbert replied, snickering as he let Ludwig fix the bowtie while putting on his tailcoat and making sure it fits him. Once Ludwig was finished, he placed on an overcoat. "They used to come over when they were still alive, but since our parents are gone, they began hosting instead in their place. And they've been doing this for years as a way to get to know people. I guess you didn't know because you weren't brought up yet; I know I was still a kid when they decided to host a party every night here during winter. But what's interesting is their only kid was a spitting image of you. He's a little older than me, but we're almost the same age."

"Why?" Ludwig adjusted his overcoat while he waited for Gilbert to hurry up.

"For someone who likes everything neat and clean, he's a gentleman," Gilbert explained, as they climbed up inside the carriage, "but with a hint of aristocracy the way he talks. He's softer toward women but harsh as hell to men; he even called me something worse than a swine once. But unlike you, he let himself get along with women rather than running away from them. He'd catch up the subject quickly, no matter what it is. He lives alone now, too, carrying on his parents' tradition of hosting a party every other night. His mother died of old age eight years ago, while his father died even before he was born."

"So how does he make me a spitting image?"

"He used to serve in the military and fight in wars, like you and I. But his side lost many times, he left the military once he had news of his mother's passing. I think we fought against each other over some territory, but it's best to ask him about it one day. I don't remember much because it was a short-term war. We may be bitter rivals, but we're close friends, too. And it's been months since I talked to him. I guess he's still upset about losing the war, after some two years. A gentleman can end up going to war you know, not just treat women with care."

As they began heading their afternoon-long trip south, the two brothers decided to take a rest throughout the ride.

* * *

After many hours seated and asleep during their travel from Munich (where their winter residence was and also where the siblings stayed) to Vienna due to a heavy snowfall in the early afternoon, they finally arrived.

"Ah, finally," Gilbert said, walking out of the carriage to stretch himself. "We're here."

Ludwig merely nodded as he stretched his arms once out of the carriage and followed Gilbert inside the mansion.

Once inside, a butler asked them to remove their overcoats before heading into the entrance hall. Without a word, they removed their coats and handed them over.

"Since this is your first time," Gilbert whispered to Ludwig, as they walked the entrance hall, "my only advice is have fun while we're in here, alright? And get along with some women; I know the ones you'll see would fall for you easily since many prefer someone who was a soldier. As much as being one isn't all fun, be gentle with them. Who knows, you might find someone you'll fall in love with." Then he laughed.

However, his younger brother looked at him in surprise.

"What?" Ludwig asked. "But I couldn't bear being around with girls, we both know that since I was a child."

Gilbert smiled. "The last time I went here," he replied, "it seems our host invited more women than men, so don't worry. There should be enough options for the women to choose who will be their match." Then he gave a serious look. "Come on, Ludwig, you're old enough to be on your own in a place like this. It's no different from the ones our parents used to hold back home. Do what you want and enjoy the night, okay?"

"If you say so," Ludwig said, shrugging and looking around.

Everything inside the mansion was in full swing. Some danced around in a waltz at one room, which was designed as a ballroom, while the others sat in large round tables at the opposite side, enjoying all the food and drink served by the many butlers hired to serve the elite for the occasion that night.

As he watched Gilbert running off to the dining area to join a table with his friends as well as some women he had met in the past, Ludwig was left standing in his spot for a few minutes, awkward and out of place as he let the others pass him by in the entrance hall. Because of his inexperience in being in another house beside his own, he had a very hard time deciding what to do next. He wanted to get food or join his brother at the dining hall, but quickly opposed both since he wasn't hungry and he barely knew all of Gilbert's friends. Dancing at the ballroom was his second decision, but because he was too bashful to approach a woman his age to ask as his partner, he dropped the decision. Around women, he would have no idea how to begin a conversation or started with a subject; with men, they would be as drunk as Gilbert, whom he could hear laughing loudly at his table.

Many minutes passed and he already wished to leave the party.

Not until he saw something that caught his eye coming from the dining area.

* * *

It was a young woman, no younger than twenty-two years and shorter than him by a head.

From where Ludwig was standing, he quickly guessed she wasn't from here, since she looked different from the other ladies within the dining hall.

With red-brown hair piled up and green-brown eyes, she truly looked rather stunning for her age. Wearing a dark red evening gown in which the short chiffon sleeves bared her shoulders, a rather low neckline revealing her chest, a bell-shaped skirt flowing down to the floor, a pair of arm-length white gloves covering her slim arms, a hairpiece adorned on her hair, she looked even more beautiful and mature than he could imagine; she didn't have too much makeup and jewellery like some of the ladies, everything fits on her perfectly. He couldn't even stand staring at those red lips, coated in the same shade of red as her dress. And looking straight into his eyes, she beckoned him to come with her. Soon enough, he was immersed in her splendour he wanted this to be an opportunity to talk to her.

Once he was near enough, the young woman drew farther away from him and hid behind the large red curtains, so no one would notice her. She didn't dare take her eyes off him as they made their way through until they reached the corridors of the house outside.

For him, she didn't just catch him standing in the entrance hall.

She lured him out of the scene and wanted to be alone with him.

As Ludwig tried to catch up to her within the curtains, he suddenly realised what was happening. This unknown beauty was leading him out and he couldn't escape from it, as he noticed where she was leading him to: the guest rooms.

"Who are you?" he kept whispering to the mysterious woman. Both of them were now standing in the hallways. "Where are you taking me?"

The young woman didn't reply; instead she turned around and, summoning him to follow her once more, entered the fourth room down the hall. And hoping Gilbert wouldn't come to look for him, Ludwig walked down the hall and opened the door where he saw her enter. Once inside, he found her standing by the window across the room. Behind her was a large bed, which was covered by black covers. As he took a step forward, he didn't care about the room's rather elegant decors as he approached her in the dark, with the only source of light coming from the moonlight outside.

"You found me," replied the young woman, turning to face him as she spoke to him for the first time. "I'm impressed."

Ludwig blinked in shock at what he heard. Although it was obvious she wasn't from around here, she could speak German fluently as if she was brought up learning it, with a very small hint of Italian accent. It gave him a sense she was from Italy.

"What did you expect?" he asked. Rather than keeping his temper from blowing off, nervousness hit him instead. "I followed you here, but…" His voice trailed off as he took another step towards her, who didn't back off this time. "Why me?" Still caught by her charm, he approached her with caution, until he stopped.

"You're the only person who would notice someone as out of place as I am," the young lady replied coolly. Then without warning she took a few steps in his direction. "Who else would notice a foreign-born young lady hiding inside the curtains? Only a person who was standing in his spot and letting people pass you by."

"That's true," Ludwig agreed. _I had been standing there for who knows how long_, he thought. "But I don't know what to do. My family used to hold parties like this in our own house, but never been in another house; I've only been out of the battlefield and our house's grounds, no more than that."

"I see." She was standing too close to him now. "So this is your first time going outside."

The young man suddenly found the room warmer than it was before. He could still hear the music from the ballroom outside, but he could now hear his heartbeat thumping loudly and speeding up. Although he was wearing three layers of clothing (his white shirt, his waistcoat with matching colour, and a black tailcoat) on his body, he felt himself breaking out in cold sweat. Everything around him became hazy as he inhaled a strong scent of perfume emitting from the young lady, which smelled strangely like a white grape-flavoured wine. He agreed to himself the smell was rather exotic. And with her just standing in front of him, only a step away from him, he knew something would happen and he would have to make the next move.

As if he couldn't take the silence hanging between them any longer, he kept his face calm, placed one hand on her cheek, and slowly drew her face closer to his. He leaned towards her, his head tilted to one side, and closed his eyes until his lips touched hers. Although he had kissed ladies' cheeks far too many times, this was first time he'd kissed a girl on the lips; despite his inexperience, he wanted to make this as realistic as possible. He didn't try to draw back and break the kiss, wanting only her right now; thinking her as a stranger to him didn't matter to him anymore. At first, the young lady jumped a little at his sudden move and almost backed away from him. But once she realised what he wanted from her, she closed her eyes and kissed him back in reply, deepening it. She opened her mouth and allowed his tongue to enter through, letting him taste the wine she drank moments before she found him back at the entrance hall. Then afterwards, his tongue entangled with hers, twisting and writhing against each other.

However what started out as a quiet moment turned into what Ludwig would've imagined as their wedding night. Still deep in their kiss, Ludwig gently pushed the young lady to the side of the bed. Once there, he set her down and crawled above her, while she slid her arms around his neck and her hands tangled around his hair before reaching down to the collar of his tailcoat and carefully slid it off until it was removed. Then as he let the tailcoat drop to the floor, he broke away from their kiss, took off his shoes and, placing his arms at either side of her, he slid one leg between hers, pushing up the front part of the skirt, including the inner layers, with his knee until he stopped at her hips.

Now he knew why she was taller than most girls at her age. Her slender legs wore a pair of white thigh-high stockings supported by the suspenders from her white lace knickers worn around her hips; he wondered if the suspenders were connected from the knickers. While he was pushing up her skirt, he felt her legs move side-by-side as she pushed her slightly heeled red slippers off her feet and coiled around his waist. Below him, he felt the young woman shift a little, but she didn't object as raised her head up to resume their kiss. She grabbed his hands and guided them around her waist to unbutton the back of her dress. While he undid the buttons, she began loosening his white bow-tie and his waistcoat before unbuttoning his shirt, revealing the upper part of his chest. Once he was finished with loosening the buttons of her dress, he lowered the sleeves further down her shoulders and into her arms. For the second time, they broke away. Underneath him, the young lady gave him a calm yet frightened look as she leaned back on the bed, unsure of what he would do next while she watched him unbuttoning his trousers.

"Are you sure you want me to do this?" Ludwig finally spoke. He looked down at her with hesitation.

"It's your choice," the young lady replied, her voice calm and soft. She didn't look at him as she spoke. "We just met. You didn't even know who I am and now you're about to sleep with me. I wouldn't mind if you do it, but I'd be worried about your older brother, if I were you. If he finds you here right now, I'd put the blame on you."

"I don't care," he answered, trying to sound firm. "I'll do it."

She didn't answer.

Without waiting for a reply, he lowered his trousers with one hand and reached up between her thighs with the other. He heard her softly gasp beneath him as she felt his hand brushing along her skin until it stopped a good distance away from the apex of her thighs. Then slowly lowering himself on her, he would silence her with another kiss before slithering inside her. But just as he was about to do so, he stopped himself, his lips slightly brushing over hers, and slid off her.

As he stood by the bed, he tried to figure out what he had done and was about to do, getting back to reality as much as he could.

"No," he whispered in horror.

"What's wrong?" He heard that innocent voice from the young woman, who sat up and looked at him. Her dress crumpled like paper, no longer beautiful as before, and her auburn hair now a mess, as some of the strands were dangling from the pile. She pushed the lowered sleeves back to her shoulders as she quietly waited for him to say something.

"What am I doing?" Ludwig whispered to himself in panic, shaking his head. "What was I doing? What was I'm about to do?" He, too, looked like a mess. His pushed back blonde hair now had some of its ends sticking out, his bow tie hanging loosely around his neck like a strip of plain white fabric, his shirt and waistcoat unbuttoned, and his trousers lowered down to his knees. Once he realised everything that had happened minutes ago, he felt horrified.

He was about to undress a young woman whom he hardly knew and just met.

_Why?_

_He fell for her not with love._

"I'm sorry," he apologised to her.

_It was with lust_.

He wanted to scream in rage, but because he was so mortified at what he had done to her, he couldn't.

"It's alright." He heard the young lady slide off the bed and placed a hand on his shoulder. Although she looked less beautiful, she still looked pretty in his eyes. "I understand you didn't mean it to happen like that. It was all too sudden for someone to push a young woman on bed after a gentle kiss." Then assuring it will be fine, she lowered her hand from his shoulder to his hand, squeezing it before letting go.

Once he remembered about asking who she was, everything around became fuzzy then foggy, until he finally blacked out and collapsed to the floor.

Although he can only hear a little, he heard something being dragged and thrown on the bed. He couldn't open his eyes, so he couldn't see what was happening. His body or his limbs weren't any help either, as his mind gradually slowed into a deep slumber.

And the last sound he heard was the door being closed shut.

* * *

The party lasted all night; even before it was dawn the next day, most of the visitors had left. The only ones left were Gilbert and Ludwig.

As for Ludwig, who was missing the whole time, Gilbert at last found him sleeping in one of the guest rooms of the mansion. Since he realised his brother wasn't in the ballroom or the dining area, and both of them already knew they will stay up all night outside, he guessed he would be at the guest rooms.

"Wake up, Lud," Gilbert was saying. "We need to go." He reached down to floor, picked up Ludwig's tailcoat from the floor, and threw it at him, hitting him on the face.

"Gilbert," Ludwig called, noticing the blur of white hair beside the bed. Then remembering last night, he quickly sat up. He was still in the same scruffy state from last night, missing only his shoes and his tailcoat. "The girl," he said to Gilbert, "what happened to her?"

"What girl? I don't recall anyone leaving the dining hall, except you. I saw you enter the place and then leave."

"She was here last night," Ludwig tried to explain everything as he slid off the bed and put on his tailcoat. "I was about to do something bad to her. Didn't you see her leave?"

"I think you're just dreaming," Gilbert replied, patting his back. "Too much dancing, I suppose. All the girls were at the party and I know just about every girl in there. You probably had too much fun dancing with one you decide to walk across the dining area and slept here for the night. Lucky we knew the Edelsteins well and allowed us to sleep in these rooms; otherwise, the host would just kick you out of the house because you looked awfully like a mess."

_He doesn't know_ Ludwig thought in disappointment, as they headed out to the entrance hall, where the young host of the house gave them a look of relief before ushering them out of the mansion. _Was I the only one who saw her? _

* * *

As they began their ride home, he wondered what happened to the young woman he met. Hearing something crinkling in his coat pocket, he reached inside and drew out a folded letter. He looked across the carriage and saw Gilbert in a deep sleep.

_It must be from her _he thought, unfolding it and reading its contents, all written in German.

_Ludwig, if you are reading this, you might wonder about what happened to me after last night's encounter. I'm fine, but unfortunately I can't tell you where I am now, just in case someone else finds this letter and reads it. It was fun being with you, though we both know it didn't last long and it wasn't enough either. You surely do treat a lady quite well, but I've never met anyone who would go as far being too intimate with someone they just met._

The next few sections of the letter were crossed out, until it stopped at the valediction two-thirds into the page. Although it was deeply crossed out with six lines, he could still read the words and continued on reading.

_If you can still read this, I hope you understand and accept what I'm about to say. There's a reason why I decided to cross this part out. Think of it as my confession to you and I know you'll keep this as a secret between you and me; you're the first and only one I put my trust not to reveal it to anyone…including your brother._

_In truth, I am not who you think I am. I am not the girl you just met; actually I'm a young man like you, only at the time I was wearing a dress. The piled up hair I wore was just an extension, held only by the hairpiece I was wearing, which thankfully didn't fall off when you made me lie down on the bed. And it took a first try for me to put on a lipstick, although I've never worn one at all. It seems odd for you to see a young man wearing a girl's clothing and I understand how unusual it is, but it was done out of my curiosity. I've kissed young ladies around my age many times before, as a way for me to be romantic, but never with young men. So I thought disguising myself as a girl and acting like one would be a great idea._

_And you fell for me, hiding within those curtains while you stood there bored._

_Although I didn't expect this, I was stunned when you kissed me, tried putting me on a bed and dared to undress me; you would've run away and told everyone who I am if you did. But fortunately, you stopped yourself. However, because of how upset you were and believing that you didn't listen to me, I'll keep everything a secret, so now we both have something to hide. You keep the fact that I'm a boy in a girl's clothing and I keep about last night's 'encounter' in the guest room._

_I know you were asking for my name, which I didn't get a chance to answer since you passed out and fell asleep. I could've answered it much sooner, but you went too far with yourself. You were really heavy when I dragged and threw you on the bed after you fell; I couldn't carry you so I dragged you by your arms instead. I know someone will find you in this room by morning and see you sleeping, so I did what I can to make it convincing and left as soon as I was finished._

_Since I found out your name by eavesdropping on a group of ladies back at the dining hall, I should tell you mine in return._

_My name is Feliciano._

_As for where I'm from, I'm from Italy. More specifically, I was born in Venice. It's almost like Vienna, if you've never been there; it's a wonderful place to spend a summer afternoon. I live there, too, so I could show you around the city. I learned to read, speak, and write German by myself since I was young, so it was easy being part of the crowd and understanding what other people are saying in any other language besides Italian. Maybe I'll teach you some Italian one day and perhaps show you how I would take _you_ down on a bed, either as a girl or a boy._

_For now, we need to be apart from each other. If we see each other again by accident, we'll go somewhere alone and spend time together._

_Until we meet again,_

_Feli_

Underneath were two postscripts: the top one was written as it was, while the bottom one was crossed, like the second part of the letter.

_P.S. Now I understand why most ladies would fall for you. Your name suits you perfectly. Ludwig is a very striking name; it even has its own variation in Italian._

_P.S. #2 I thought I'd tell you this from my viewpoint about last night, but it was definitely your first time kissing a girl. I wouldn't be much astounded if it was your first in kissing someone from the same gender; it's my first time as well. And I don't think I'd count kissing on both cheeks; to me it means a greeting between close friends. Still, I have to admit you've kissed better than the girls I've met in the past. Whether it was because you wanted it special and expressive or simply because you're a boy, I can't tell._

After reading the letter, he stared at the blank bottom of the page for a long time. He'd never felt more revolted at himself for what he did.

He kissed and nearly slept with a younger man.

* * *

_How? _He wondered angrily. _How can he dress and behave like a woman and treat me like a gentleman? Why would he do this to me?_

_Or was it my fault I fell for him? I'm the one to blame for looking at this young lady gesturing me to come and follow her? Did he know about my insecurities toward women? How I can't always get along with them?_

Although he did feel regret about himself, at the same time he felt something else opposite of it. He wanted to be with her (or, if he meets Feliciano as a man, him) again, dressed as a young woman again. But besides kissing her again, he wanted to be a little rough on her than last night. He wanted to shove her on a bed, similar to the one at the mansion's guest room, crawl over her, pin her down, and allow him to remove all her clothes until she was fully bare beneath him; he'd tear them off, if he wanted to. Then he would undress himself and continue where he stopped from the previous night.

All this just so he would protect his secret from ever being known.

Without a word, he folded the letter once more and slipped it back into his pocket, deciding to keep it while wondering where Feliciano is at the moment. And since no address was written anywhere, they would have to see each other face to face.

Whether Feliciano disguises himself as a girl or not, it would be something Ludwig would be looking forward to.

_I'll be waiting…_

* * *

_All right, the nicest anyone can do is to write a review. Seriously this is a one-shot short story. I just threw some yaoi thrown in halfway through, followed by a nearly f'd up scene, Ludwig about to have a one night stand with a girl who later turns out to be a boy (why do you think I made him stop reaching up the girl's thighs before he finds out he nearly hooked up with a guy? The story would be over the moment Ludwig touches Feliciano's…you know, his you-know-what. Followed by Ludwig screaming his lungs off and a sign that says 'BAD END' or something). An ending that would get an 'Oh hell no!" and a party similar to how Jay Gatsby would hold his party every single night._

_I was trying to find a nice fanart of Ludwig and Feliciano anywhere (Feli dressed as a girl, not as Nyotalia version), and fayuled. I really couldn't find any! /lame_

_And I doubt I'll write another short story this long, either. I still feel traumatised after writing the scene in which Ludwig pushes Feliciano on the bed; it really is my first time writing something like that. I'm not even going to write a sequel for this either, unless it's asked for._

_Now some notes (or more BS from me) from the story:_

_- When Gilbert was talking to Ludwig about them against Roderich, who lost in a battle, he was referring to the Austro-Prussian War, which seemed like a really short, somewhat pointless and important war in the case of freeing Northern Italy from Austrian rule, which did happen. Pointless because it lasted barely a month and a half, and it's obvious Prussia didn't want to be with Austria. And then how many times did Austria lost to Prussia? I'd say a lot really._

_- Gilbert and Ludwig's father was Old Fritz. Again, it's mainly an AU._

_- Finally when Gilbert found Ludwig sleeping in the guest room, he's really drunk since he spent the entire night partying like there's no tomorrow, but he didn't sleep with girls. He's way too drunk for that to happen._

_And dammit, a guy wrote this, okay? Not a girl. He just happened to read too much of these and watched too many films of these, it's not even funny. I don't even know if guys can manage to pull off a story that's entirely about a guy falling for a guy._


End file.
